Monday, November 19, 2007
But when i stop thinking bout that....
Haiz... last night slept at 6plus in the morning.....
Woke up around 12 or 1....
When i woke up i saw my dad at home....
Tried waking my dog up but then he ignored me and just slept.......
So after washing up.....
I log into msn...
After that watch television and found out there's nothing to watch.....
So i went into my room....
and did nothing.....
Then i started thinking....
Thinking bout her of course.....
Then thought of all the things i've done and what i've said.....
and i after that thought of what she said.....
and i thought it over....
I'm just a stupid guy who always say the wrong thing.....
and i fell so stupid and guilty....
That i said such stupid things....
To make her sad, angry and brokenhearted......
I hope that i can do something bout that.....
I've also been thinking.....
About my own life.....
and about my friends....
About why and how i've become the person i am now.....
and i just remebered.....
It was through the setback in my lifes....
I've been betrayed be my best friend in the past....
and it's not the normal kind......
That bugger turned my friends all againce me....
Every single one......
and before that.....
He told every one bout my secrects that i shared with him....
and even though i'e forgived him alot of times.....
He still never change.....
and ever since.....
I've seal all the positive side of me......
But just when i completly though that......
I don't need those kind of feelings.....
and it's not use living anymore........
Then princess came into my life.....
She was the one who has liven me up.....
Made me think differently about the world....
and about people....
and about life......
and because of her......
I actually felt happyness.....
Which i actually forgot how it actually felt.....
and it was like no other happyness.....
It's the kind i never felt before......
and it's called love......
and i felt it twice....
Firstly is with the princess....
Secondly during confirmation camp....
Where i felt god's love....
Which was like love...
But in a whole different feeling....
It's undescribable.....
That you need to feel it yourself to know it truly....
and after feeling it....
For once i felt as though i exist.....
and that i'm actually still alive....
Well i don't wanna say anymore......
It's affecting my mood
I thought of my friends too......
My friends that i'm was always with....
Is like have thier group of their own.....
For example first group: skating....
I don't even like skating anymore.....
In fact i'm starting to hate it....
Second group: talking about online games
The games that they play are the ones that i don't even play
and if i download it my com will be slower then usual
and it's super slow already.....
Third group: stupid people
Thier english SUCKS and they always act pro.....
and the so called leader of the group.......
is the guy that i taught him how to hook up a girl.....
and now his a filrt.....
last group.... fourth group:nerds side....
I don't even talk to them and.....
They are not even my friends more of a aquaintance.....
and all they talk is crap......
I don't even understand what they talk about
Anyway....
I'm still chatting with bren online.....
It's like 6.16am already....
and we're still goin on chatting....
Later need ask her go sleep....
She need collect report book....
and she has been on the phone.....
For more then 5 hours lah....
Can't belive that she can talk so long....
Anyway....
I'm like bored....
and my parents are goin to wake up soon....
So... Yah...
Got to go!!!
LeGeNdFrEaK
2facedfreak